If you like living i suggest you try and aviod these rules
by Fenix-Eileen-Riddle
Summary: just random rules, of what you should not do while you are at the base
1. Rules 1-15

HAY GUYS ITS ME AGAIN, I'm writing new rules I also am taking a few from my old one and changing them up a bit! Hope you like them!

Fenix: We do not own transformers  
Crissy: That we do not sadly  
Issy: If we did that would be AWESOME  
Fenix: BUT we don't so yeah  
Crissy: but have fun reading these  
Issy: DON'T GET ANY IDEAS

Rule 1

DO NOT AND I REPEAT DO NOT MAKE PROWL GLTICH

**Fenix: Yeah guys  
Crissy: You do it to Fenix!  
Issy: Yeah don't go blaming just us it's you to!**

Rules 2:

Do not disturb Fenix if she is reading if you want to live to see another day

**Sides: Sunny and I learnt that the hard way  
Crissy: as did Sam, Leo, Miles, Issy, Will, Epps, Galloway, Ratchet, Ironhide, Optuims, Prowl, Jazz, Issy and I  
Issy: Crissy why did you just say everyone would have been easier!  
Crissy: I don't like doing things the simple way**

Rule 3

If the girls (Crissy, Fenix, and Issy, Annabelle, Mikaela) are watching the new Disney Frozen movie do not turn it off or tell them to stop singing to the songs OR talk through it

**Leo: I've never been chased my so many angry females  
Miles: I second that  
Fenix: Servers you right humph **

Rule 4

Do not question the bot's the girls chose

_Crissy-IronHide  
Issy- Prime  
Fenix- Ratchet  
Mikaela- the twins (Sunny and Sides)_

_Rule 5 _

Do not ever bring up that incident about how the little girl thought IronHide was the tooth fairy

**Fenix: It makes good blackmail the only thing is that you end up with a canon to your head  
Crissy: But yet your still stupid enough to do it  
Fenix: that I am *smiles***

Rule 6

If Ratchet has a Spark mate which does do not ask him does he only date young femmes to fell young again

**Crissy: I've never in my hole entire life of knowing Fenix have I seen her that pissed of  
Issy: It was scary  
Sam: Glad that Leo and Miles can run  
Will: But they can't run fast enough  
Fenix: It's their own fault **

Rule 7

Don't call Prowl any colour Cybertornian words even if has pissed you

**Fenix: You will end up in the Brig take it from me  
Sam: Yet you still do it?  
Crissy: That's our Fenix **

Rule 8

Don't say "What's up Doc" or "Tell me am I going to live" or any other quotes similar

**Fenix: UNLESS YOUR ME  
Ratchet: No you're not allowed to either  
Fenix: What awwww! **

Rule 9

Do not throw wrenches at Ratchet

**Fenix: Even if he is being an aft -.-**

Rule 10

CLOTHES ARE A BIG MANATORY!

**Issy: LEO! AND ALL THE OTHER MALES THAT WALK AROUND NAKED  
Crissy: We don't want to see your junk  
Fenix: If we wanted to see a males junk we would go to our mates!**

Rule 11

Don't be a smartass to IronHide

**Fenix: You don't only have to face his cannons but you have to face his mate Crissy  
Crissy: Yet you still put yourself in that situation  
Fenix: WEELLLLL IF HE WASN'T SUCH A AFT I WOULDN'T!**

Rule 12

Don't ever try and tell Prowl how to do his job

**Will: why is the rule here?  
Crissy: Ask Fenix  
Will: Fenix..? do I dare to ask  
Fenix: Let's not go there just don't do it  
Issy: I bet you're not going to do that again in a hurry are you Fenix  
Fenix: umm NO.!**

Rule 13

Do not run around and act like a dinosaur

**Prime: They do not like it FENIX!  
Fenix: How was I meant to know they would finding it insulting **

Rule 14

Do not wolf whistle at Ratchets, IronHides or Primes Holo forms unless you are Fenix, Crissy or Issy

**Epps: I kinda feel sorry for those female soldiers  
Fenix: NO ONE WHISTLES AT MY BOT  
Crissy: IM WITH FENIX  
Issy: SO AM I**

Rule 15

Do not wolf whistle at Fenix, Crissy or Issy again unless you are Ratchet, IronHide or Prime

**IronHide: EVERYONE!  
Ratchet: if you are a bot you will have wrench thrown at your head or be shot with IronHides cannons OR you will face Prime and he will put you in the Brig  
Prime: That I will  
Crissy, Fenix, Issy: awww thanks guys!**


	2. Rules 16-25

Crissy: Here are the next set of rules  
Fenix: Again we do not own anything from transformers  
Issy: Just our names

Rule 16

Do not argue with Fenix you will not win

**Fenix: Unless you're Prowl, Ratchet or Prime :( they always win  
Crissy: and Sometimes IronHide  
Issy: but against everyone you win!**

Rule 17

Do not get in the middle of an argument between Prowl and Fenix or Prime and Fenix

**Fenix: I'M SORRY RATCHET  
Ratchet: it better not happen again my femme  
Fenix: I'm not making promises but im just going to state that if it does happen its safer for you not to get involved  
Ratchet: But I love you and I don't want my femme hurt  
IronHide: Aww Ratchy has a soft side  
Fenix: *runs after hide with cannons and shots him*  
Crissy: FENIX!  
Ratchet: Aww thanks babe but you got yourself in trouble  
Fenix: we do stupid things for the ones we love  
Barricade: STOP WITH ALL THE LOVEY DOVEY STUFF  
Fenix: Its okay to be upset Barricade you will find someone, one day ^w^ **

Rule 18

Do not call Ratchet "Ratchy" Unless he says you or if you are Fenix

**Ratchet: IRONHIDE!  
Sam: hehe Ratchy  
Will: Sam I wouldn't  
Sam: TO LATE *RUNS AWAY dodging wrenches* **

Rule 19

Don't remind Sam of how he had to tell Bee the Bird's and Bee's talk

**Fenix: HOLY FRAG THAT WAS THE MOST FUNNIEST THING I HAVE ENCOUTERED MY ENTIRE LIFE  
Crissy: I agree hahaha  
Issy: It's good black mail**

Rule 20

Do not laugh your aft / ass off if Ratchet or Prime says the word canoodling with the most serious facial expression

**Fenix: Primus I've never laughed so hard before I couldn't breathe IronHides and Crissy's face was priceless  
Ratchet: We were in a meeting it was an inappropriate time  
Issy: Fenix and I were put in the brig for laugh so hard so was IronHide and Crissy for shooting at us**

Rule 21

Do not say Fenix will not shot you… she will

**Sam: And what made you do that  
Fenix: the stupid glitching soldier was trying to tell me that I was using the gun that IronHide made wrong and I didn't know how to shot, he soon learnt that I am very good at not only shooting but aiming I just missed his head his face was priceless and then he went and told Prime. Ratchet, Prime and Prowl are not very happy with me and I got a big lecture from all of them about not shooting humans. IronHide on the other hand was very amused **

Rule 22

Do not poke Ratchet, Prime, IronHide or Prowl… they do not like it

**Fenix: LEO, MILES!**

Rule 23

Sneaking out is a big no, no doesn't matter who you are If its past 10pm don't do it

**Fenix: Yeah Ratchet! You rule breaker  
Crissy: You were with him…  
Issy: Am I the only won who is surprised that Ratchet broke the rules  
Will: How where the alarms not trigged  
Fenix: He turned them off before we left but someone told on us stupid Sunny  
Prowl: What if were attacked we wouldn't off known  
Jazz: Still cant believe Ol' Hatchet broke a rule that's a first  
Prime: I never thought ill see the day where Ratchet would break a rule  
Ratchet: We needed to get away from the base  
Fenix: Yeah and you tried lying to them Ratchet and you should know that they knew you where lying but as amusing as it is seeing Ratchet in the brig it wasn't funny for the next week he was so grumpy and annoyed.**

Rule 24

This is a big no no if you want a cranky ass Ratchet on your aft/ ass do not leave the med bay with-out his permission

**Ratchet: This includes you Fenix  
Fenix: BUT I was Fine  
Ratchet: if by you mean passing out and smashing your head and making it worse fine then you my femme are very wrong  
Fenix: Well if the twins where not mucking about I would have been fine but not sides had to come skidding it front of me nearly hitting me and then me falling back and nearly hitting Sunny but he moved back so I wouldn't hit him **

Rule 25

Do not tell Ratchet he snores

**Fenix: SUNNY! SIDES! He wouldn't come to recharge until he put up cameras to make sure he doesn't and we couldn't do anything because of the cameras and he doesn't snore so it was a waste of time but bloody hell did they have what was coming, not only did they have Ratchet and his wrenches but they had me and my cannons and non-water proof paint. They couldn't get it off from 2 months taught them a lesson. **


	3. Rules 26-40

Crissy: We do not own transformers that is all

Rule 26

Do not try and steal or hide Fenix's food she love her food very much

**Fenix: LEO, MILES, SAM, BEE, RATCHET!**

Rule 27

Starscream is not Megatrons bitch

**Sam: what gave youse that idea  
Issy: The fact that Megatron beats him?  
Sam: Oh and who was stupid enough to ask him that  
Crissy: Fenix was  
Fenix: Lets just say I was someone's target practices for two days and then that someone was someone's else target practices of 3 days  
Ratchet: Megatron should know not to shot at a bots femme**

Rule 28

Yes Fenix has tattoos don't judge her

**Fenix: Ratchet doesn't know yet  
Ratchet: YOU WHAT!  
IronHide: she has tattoos  
Ratchet: When did this happen?  
Crissy: The other week she got them all done in the one day  
Ratchet: You are in big trouble missy  
Fenix: Ratchet its my body -.-  
Ratchet: you still shouldn't of done it  
Fenix: Why not!  
Ratchet: Come see me in my med bay we are not discussing this here  
Fenix: I'm not coming  
Ratchet: Fenix…  
Sunny: Oh sides Fenix is in trouble!  
Sides: No way!**

Rule 29

Do not get in the middle of an argument between Ratchet and Fenix it will not end well for you

**Prowl: Sunny, Sides**

Rule 30

If Ratchet is ranting and throwing things do not enter the med bay enter at your own risk

**Jolt: Prime got the fright of his life and a lot of dints as did Prowl  
Prime: and Ratchet got the brig  
Sides: OH SHIT SUNNY RATCHET IS IN THE BRIG AGAIN  
Sunny: NO WAY DUDE!**

Rule 31

Do not make fun of Ratchet when he is in trouble you will not only end up in the brig but will suffer any damage that you will get from Ratchet

**Fenix: Jolt had to fix the twins once they were let of the brig, the twins are not allowed near Ratchet for the next 2 weeks**

Rule 32

Do not interrupt Fenix while she is watching Once Upon a Time it will not end well for anyone

**Crissy: Just ask Leo  
Issy: And Miles  
Crissy: And Sam  
Issy: And Will  
Crissy: Epps  
Issy: Sunny  
Crissy: Sides  
Issy: Optimus  
Crissy: IronHide  
Issy: That random solider  
Crissy: Mupflap  
Issy: Skids  
Crissy: Jazz  
Fenix: okay we get it, you can stop now  
Issy: Oh we can't forget Glen  
Crissy: and jolt  
Issy: and blur  
Fenix: OKAY WE GET IT!  
Crissy: but we aren't done  
Issy: AND PROWL  
Fenix: Are youse done now  
Crissy, Issy: Yes  
Issy: no we forgot Ratchet  
Fenix: GUYS SERIOUSLY  
Issy: Okay we are done now**

Rule 34

Do not interrupt Fenix if she is watching House MD, Orange is the new black, Rizzoli and Isles, 2 Broke girls, or well any tv show she is watching

**Crissy: Just ask the people above**

Rule 35

If Fenix is sleeping do not disturb her, only do that at your own risk

**Issy: Yeah just ask Ratchet  
Crissy: and Leo and Miles  
Fenix: here we go again**

Rule 36:

Yes Fenix got her tongue, belly and nose pierced no you cant make fun of her

**Crissy: Wait till Ratchet finds out  
Ratchet: YOU WHAT  
Issy: Here we go again  
Fenix: Again Ratchet my body my rules **

Rule 37:

Never ask Ratchet if he is hormonal, he will give you a lecture

**Sam: Should I even bother asking who did this  
Crissy and Issy: A very, very pissed off Fenix**

Rule 38:

If the bots are busy doing something don't ask if they want a cookie, the will throw it on the ground and step on it

**Crissy: Fenix cried, Prowl and Optimus was confused as to why  
Issy: I don't think I have heard anyone say that many swear words, English or Cybertorn  
Fenix: I got in a lot of trouble from Ratchet, Prowl and Optimus, and Crissy.  
Crissy: Well look what you did to IronHide  
Fenix: He killed Chip  
**

Rule 39:

Don't talk Parseltongue English is hard enough for the bot's lets not make it harder

**Fenix: But it's so much fun! And I can't help it If I'm a Slytherin  
Crissy: I'm Gryffindor  
Issy: Hufflepuff here  
Sam: Ravenclaw!  
Mikaela: Guys not again!**

Rule 40:

Don't call Prowl or any bot for that matter any 'colourful' cybertorn words

**Fenix: Again you will be in heaps of trouble and probably in the brig for a while  
Crissy: When will you ever learn  
Issy: I don't think she will  
Fenix: nope, it's too much fun. **


	4. Rules 41-55

Fenix: Back again!  
Crissy: With Some new rules  
Issy: As we have stated before we do not own Transformers

Rule 41: Yes Fenix's human form is 5"1 no that does not mean you can make fun of her

**Fenix: LEO! MILES!  
Crissy: IRONHIDE !  
Ironhide, Miles, Leo: But you so tiny and cute  
Fenix: I AM NOT CUTE FEAR ME FOR I AM THE DEVIL!  
Ratchet: No they actually are right my femme you are cute  
Fenix: Aww Ratchy**

Rule 42: if the girls and most of the soldiers are having a Harry Potter marathon for Alan Rickman and cry over Snapes death do not laugh… it will not end 4very well

**Fenix: MILES, LEO, IRONHIDE  
Ironhide: I just find it amusing that you squishes cry about anything and everything **

Rule 43: Just because Fenix is blonde doesn't mean she is dumb

**Fenix: do I even bother needing to say who said this?**

Rule 44: If playing Hide-N-Seek do not hide in Optimus trailer piece thingie… you will be in trouble even more so if there is a Decepticon attack and he isn't aware you are in there.

**Ratchet: FENIX!, you could of got killed  
Fenix: Well I wouldn't off, if they found me!  
Crissy: How where we meant to know you would choose that hiding spot!?**

Rule 45: Don't ask Optimus 'What's Haulin' when he has his extended trailer… you will end up in the brig

**Crissy: Sigh why did you even do that Fenix, you knew you would get into trouble  
Fenix: *Shrugs* Just wanted to see his reaction his face was pretty priceless and then he got mad and said I was being rude and disrespectful  
Prime &amp; Issy: That's because you where  
Fenix *Grumbles* Sorry, *Mutters* Party poopers **

Rule 46: DON'T MAKE ANNABELLE CRY

**Fenix: Not only will you have an angry Will and Sarah after you but you will have an angry IronHide, Crissy, and Fenix after you,  
Will: Those twins are lucky they aren't dead! (skids and mudflap) **

Rule 47: Do not give Fenix, Crissy, and Issy alcohol or high grade energon…

**Sam: Enough said **

Rule 48: Fenix is afraid of water, because of her past, don't ever throw her in the water!

**Fenix: SKIDS! MUDFLAP  
Crissy: SHE CANT SWIM GUYS!  
Fenix: I'm just glad Epps was close by thanks again Epps  
Epps: Nothing to it  
Issy: Skids and Mudflap are now in the brig after having a furious Ratchet on their aft's  
Fenix: Ratchet want's to teach me how to swim… not gonna happen sorry Ratch  
Ratchet: What happens if it happens again  
Prime: They better not do it again, otherwise their punishment will be worse **

Rule 49: we are aware that Fenix has nightmares please don't bring them up she hates talking about it

**Crissy: Yeah Ratchet, Ironhide, Sam, Leo, Miles!  
Ratchet: She needs to talk to someone about it! I can feel how scared she gets it's terrifying  
Leo: are we even sure it's even nightmares  
Issy: *Growls, runs after Leo* HOW COULD YOU EVEN SAY THAT YOU AFT!**

Rule 50: If Ratchet, Ironhide, Prime, Galloway or Will are in an angry or bad mood, do not throw skittles at them and scream taste the rainbow be the rainbow and run away…

**Fenix: You will get put in the brig  
Crissy: As funny as it was I question your sanity sometimes  
Fenix: Why don't you question it all the time…**

Rule 51: DO NOT LET THE AUTO-BOTS PLAY MONOPLY

**Fenix: They don't like it if they are losing  
Crissy: Ironhide blew up the bored  
Issy: And Prime flipped the table  
Fenix: Ratchet just threw wrenches at us  
Sam: So next time let them win**

Rule 52: As a matter of fact don't let any of the bot's play any board games

**Fenix: As we said above… the don't like losing **

Rule 53: Do not make fun of who Jess is dating

**Fenix: I think it's cute Barricade finely has someone  
Crissy: AND THEY ARE SO CUTE TOGETHER!  
Issy: Tell me about it!  
Jess: *Chuckles* Thanks girls**

Rule 54: Just because Fenix is eating a bread cone full of Mac &amp; Cheese with bacon on top does not mean she is pregnant

**Fenix: Not that I know of anyway…  
Ratchet: MED BAY NOW!  
Crissy: SO?!  
Ratchet &amp; Fenix: WE ARE HAVING TWINS! A FEMME AND A MECH!  
Everyone on base: CONGRATS! **

Rule 55: don't make fun of Fenix's cravings

**Crissy: JUST DON'T  
Leo: But they are so weird!?  
Issy: It's doesn't matter how weird they are leave her and her craving alone**

**a/n hey everyone hope you like it if you want to leave a review you can or if you have any ideas you would like to see happen feel free to add some :) **


	5. Rules 56-70

Crissy: Hi everyone, it's us again  
Fenix: and this time we own transformers  
Issy: No we don't Fenix stop lying  
Fenix: I wish we did tho :(  
Crissy: Anyway here are rules 56-70 I hope you enjoy!

Rule 56: Don't let the transformers watch DeadPool…

**Fenix: WheelJack got 1 to many idea's **

Rule 57: Do not scare the bots'

**Fenix: You will get shot…  
Crissy: and in trouble won't you Fenix  
Issy: Prowl, Optimus, and Ratchet where not expecting that…**

Rule 58: Do not annoy or anger the bots… this includes the Decepticons

**Crissy: Again you will get shot…  
Issy: Just ask Fenix…  
Fenix: But it's so easy to annoy Ironhide  
Crissy: So that doesn't mean you can do it **

Rule 59: Do not make fun of Barricade and Jess

**Fenix: LEO &amp; MILES  
Crissy: Just because the ex con has a mate and you don't**

Rule 60: If Megatron and Starscream are mates it none of your business

**Fenix: I was curious… I ended up being target practise… does that make it a yes?**

Rule 61: This has been said once already… DO NOT AVIOD CHECK UPS RATCHET WILL HUNT YOU DOWN

**Ratchet: Fenix this includes you… just because you're my mate doesn't mean you can avoid check ups…**

Rule 62: Do not sneak out of the brig

**Fenix: You will be in there longer and have a guardian to watch you… it will either be Prowl or Ironhide and they both have better things to do then keep an eye on you**

Rule 63: If it is that time of month for any females on the base either stay away or runaway

**Fenix: Leo, Miles, both sets of twins…  
Crissy: Some of the soldiers  
Issy: and sometimes our mates**

Rule 64: If doing a dare and it involves Prowl DO NOT DO IT

**Fenix: I got dared to kiss Prowl on the check and tell him that I appreciate him and what he does for the base… he glitched and then I had to take him to Ratchet and explained what happened… he wasn't happy with me, when he woke I got a lecture from both Prowl and Optimus **

Rule 65: DO NOT IGNORE PROWL, OPTIMUS OR RATCHET…

**Fenix: enough said **

Rule 66: Do not swear around Ironhide, Will, Optimus, Ratchet or Prowl… it doesn't matter if its English or in cybertron you will get in trouble

**Crissy: Just ask our trouble maker…. Fenix**

Rule 67: If watching Nightmare before Christmas do not watch it around the bots' more so Red Alert

**Issy: Do I even need to bother to say way**

Rule 68: Do not make fun of Megatron even if he has changed his alt mode…

**Fenix: I asked if he forgot how to fly since he is now a truck…  
Crissy: Why?  
Issy: Leo dared her to**

Rule 69: Just because the fighting has stopped between the Auto-bots and Decepticons doesn't mean they will join our side…

**Fenix: Unless you're Barricade **

Rule 70: Don't throw Salsa at Starscream and call him Giant Dorito Bot,

**Fenix: Not only with you be Starscream's target you will also be Megatron's… just ask Leo  
Leo: NEVER AGAIN!**


	6. Rules 71-85

Fenix: We welcome you rules 71-85  
Issy: We don't own transformers  
Crissy: Yet…

Rule 71: Do not judge Fenix of her obsession with Marvel...

**Crissy just ask the same people on #32 **

Rule 72: When there is a fight between two or more bots' do not run towards this screaming/shouting this is Sparta

**Fenix: You will either almost get stood on, Thrown across the room or get confused looks… if you are unlucky you will get all 3… **

Rule 73: Do not play the Jaws theme when Prowl, Ratchet or Ironhide walk into the room

**Fenix: Just ask Leo what happened **

Rule 74: Do not make fun of the name Fenix and Ratchet picked out for their sparklings

**Fenix: There is nothing wrong with the names Lazer and Blaze**

Rule 75: No horror movies at the base…

**Fenix: Not only because of RedAlert but because of me… I refused to sleep after watching them… Ratchet was not happy that he didn't get to recharge **

Rule 76: If you need to Recharge or sleep then do so, do not exceed over the 3 day period we do not need you hallucinate that the con's or someone is after you

**Ratchet: Fenix…  
Fenix: I COULDN'T HELP IT! THAT MOVIE WAS SCARY!**

Rule 77: Do not piss of Fenix

**Crissy: I don't know who was angrier…  
Issy: out of Ratchet, Prime and Fenix?  
Crissy: Yes! Fenix is terrifying when she is angry she puts Megatron to shame…  
Fenix: I think the twins soon learnt their lessons  
Ratchet: As did you  
Fenix: Still can't believe you took their side  
Ratchet: I didn't take anyone side Fenix  
Crissy &amp; Issy: Uh oh…**

Rule 78: If you see Ratchet running.. RUN!

**Crissy: he pissed off Fenix…  
Issy: Fenix was throwing wrenches and shooting him  
Crissy: She was in a lot of trouble when Prime got a hold of her  
Issy: She is now calming down… in the shooting range…**

Rule 79: If Fenix is in the shooting range AVIOD IT AT ALL COST!

**Crissy: This includes you Ironhide **

Rule 80: Don't purposely make your mate jealous

**Ratchet: I didn't mean to…  
Fenix: Ha, Righto  
Ratchet: it wasn't my fault  
Fenix: okay whatever you say  
Crissy: We went out on a triple date. Me and Ironhide, Issy and Optimus, Ratchet and Fenix, Fenix went to the toilet she come back to find some random chick flirting with Ratchet… let's just say we ran and Ratchet is now in trouble… as is Fenix **

Rule 81: Do not use online shopping,

**Fenix: The bot's don't seem to like it when random parcels rock up they think it could be dangerous **

Rule 82: If going off base let someone know…

**Fenix: It's doesn't matter if they person is human or not just tell someone…  
Crissy: Fenix had us all worried!  
Fenix: I WAS FINE!  
Issy: Luckily Ratchet is her spark-mate**

Rule 83: if Spark-mated do not block them out

**Crissy: again it was Fenix!  
Issy: She was yet again pissed off at Ratchet… then we had two pissed of bot's  
Ironhide: Ratchet is an aft when he is angry  
Fenix: Tell me about it :( **

Rule 84: Do not tell Prowl off

**Prowl: You will end up in the brig… take it from Fenix, she might have been having a bad day. Doesn't mean she can treat anyone like that…**

Rule 85: leave Fenix and her book collection alone if she find one missing without asking or out of place run..

**Crissy: The twins thought It would be a great prank to hide all of Fenix's books…  
Issy: They are now all in the brig Optimus is watching them… **


End file.
